sorry to all my pregnant friends out there...

...but this is too good to keep to myself.

Nick turned me onto this hilarious girl comedy group called Garfunkel and Oates. They have a song called Pregnant Women Are Smug. I'm attaching the video, but I know most people (myself included) don't click on links no matter how awesome. (Although I sincerely hope you watch the video below of my amazing brother proposing to his girl. It's awe inspiring. Maybe if I brag on him enough, he'll make a witty comment.)

Okay, so here are the lyrics to the amazing song. Thankfully, none of my friends have acted like this (so far), but all know someone who has, or is right on the edge. Only organic food and clothing? No sugar/carbs/dairy/unfiltered air? How about the women who swear they can have a painless birth at home without any drugs? Please. I've never had a kid, but I'm pretty sure that shit hurts. I can barely keep my eyes from rolling back into my head when I get around people like this.

Anyway, the lyrics are as follows. Watch the video and sing along! And promise me and yourself that you will never act like those smug pregnant women...

PREGNANT WOMEN ARE SMUG

Pregnant women are smug

Everyone knows it, nobody says it,

Because they’re pregnant


F-ing son of a gun

You think you’re so deep now

You give me the creeps now

Now that you’re pregnant


I can’t count all the ways how

You speak in clichés now


I can’t wait to hear someone say

Don’t care if it’s brain dead

Don’t care if it’s limbless

If it has a penis


Pregnant women are smug

Everyone knows it, nobody says it,

Because they’re pregnant


This zen world you’re enjoying

Makes you really annoying


Bitch, I don’t really care

I was being polite now

Since you have no life now

That you’re pregnant


You say you’re walking on air

You think that you’re glowing

But you had been ho-ing

And now you’re pregnant


You’re just giving birth now

You’re not mother earth now


Pregnant women are smug

Everyone knows it, nobody says it,

because they’re pregnant


F-ing son of a gun

You think you’re so deep now

You give me the creeps now

Now that you’re pregnant